click your curser by the fish and leave them food to eat

April 14, 2008

my million dollar shot

I have finally hit the big time. I knew my ship would come in some day.And with the wonderful world wide webb I will be able to sail away into the sunset. Ebay is one of those great sites you can make your millions on. People will buy just about anything. So if pieces of french toast with the picture of the Virgin Mary burned into can sell then so can mine. I was making my lunch the other morning casually grabbing potatoe chips out of the bag when what do I lay my hands on? The chip with the smily face!!! It is a sign I know it is a sign. And I think I am going to sell it to highest bidder. The sweet life here I come!








 
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Crawl first

Writing is a lot like walking I have discovered. With walking you first learn to crawl. You can’t get very far but it is better than sitting around watching the world go by. As you learn to grab hold of the edge of the table you teeter and sway as you stand, wow the world is so different from this point of view. You fall often as you persist to try again and again to find balance. But with one foot in front of the other you finally take that first magical step. There begins the journey. Slowly at first with great caution, carefully ever so carefully, because you have learned it can be painful to fall on one’s bum. It seems like the learning part takes for ever but before you know it you are running with the big kids.

Writing is the same way; you painfully crawl across the paper, trying to allow the natural flow of thought. With one word in front of another you slowly see sentences start to take shape, though at first not much of it makes sense. You strive to bring color and intention to paper what seem so vivid in your mind. You try again and again to rearrange the words to best express yourself but you continue to fall on your bum. Why does thought flow so easily but words are so constrained? It is hard to put into words ones thoughts and emotions without sounding like gibberish.
I guess one starts as one walks with first a crawl, followed with that teetering stand as you begin to look at the world with a different perspective. At last it all comes together. The magic of written words, taking you to places you never dreamed of going.
You finally get to run with the big kids.

April 8, 2008

It is my birthday today




I turn fifty three today, normally I would not announce this to the world, but this one has special significance. My father died when he turned fifty three on May 3rd .......... his birthday. He is the only I know of that was born and then died on the same day.

This picture of my Father was taken thirty three years ago he was 48.

For the last year I have thought about this a lot. Will I wake up that morning? Would I follow in his footsteps and have a heart attack? Will I live to see another day?

It is such a weird thing to think about.

I am not afraid of death, I kind of look forward to it because I know who my savior is. It is just the fact that I am the same age as he was. All those many years ago he seemed so much older. Fifty Three is not old.

I miss him, I wish I could have know him better. He was a very private man. Raised in the depression, he grew up facing tough times. A blue collar kind of guy in fact he kind of reminded me of Archie Bunker, he had the same type of facial details, with that sad tired look in his eyes. The eyes tell it all, eyes that have seen and experienced too much in life. Tired eyes, when one has worked too hard for too little.

Born in 1927 he was the third of twelve. The family migrated here from Ireland and the Welsh country. His younger years were tough. I use to hear tidbits sitting around the table during family reunions about how rowdy he and his brothers were. They never expanded on those stories, too many children around with big ears. I do have a picture some where with him and another brother sitting on a ledge at Boys Town USA, yes the real one with Father Flannigan. My brothers and sisters and I were told that they were sent there because the family could no longer afford to feed everyone since it was during the depression. I think maybe if truth were to be told it was because they were just a little bit too rowdy to handle.

So I guess it shouldn’t have surprised me when I found out he once was a semi-pro boxer. I have one picture of him in his boxing trunks, it is the only picture I have showing him with a full head of hair. I only knew him as being bald. I wish I could find that picture.

His life was not all bad nor was his times all tough. He did a good job raising a family in the middle of a wheat field in eastern Washington. Even though there was not a lot of money we did not lack and there were many good times. He was a hard working Irish man, with a love for the Boy Scouts. I will always have wonderful memories of our family vacations on the Oregon Coast. And I was lucky enough to have him still here to walk me down the isle. I wish I could have known him better.


So here I am Fifty Three, the same age as he was when he died. I miss him.

All I know is the Good Lord is not done with me yet because he allowed me to wake up this morning..................Halleluiah!


So I will sit with my morning coffee, thanking my God that He sustains me. Watching the little birdies feed outside my patio door. (There is something very peaceful about this.) Then I have the great privilege of taking my daughter who is 7 months pregnant to her ultra sound, to be able to see the amazing gift of life inside her, my second granddaughter.


So I celebrate my life today.



I am blessed with three lovely grown children all finding there way in the world. My first granddaughter never ceases to make me laugh who truly is the joy of my life, and I am surrounded by wonderful group of friends. Life can’t get much better than this.

My times are in His hands!

What an amazing day this already is!!

April 2, 2008

A snippet

I have been thinking about what to write next, I am tortured over this. I made the statement when I started blogging I was not going to be consumed by this. I was not not going to stay up untill all of hours of the night, writing and reading other blogs.But that is not happening. Two nights in a row now I have stayed up untill midnight. I am consumed. This can't happen, life has to go on, before you know it I will be calling in sick to work to write my blog. I still have dishes and laundry to do for pete's sake.

I struggle in knowing what to write, which in making that statement in itself is kind of funny. Since I have never been known as one with few words. Hmmmmmmm can a woman express herself with just a few words? Nor have I been afraid to express my opinions. Ask my dear friend Jules about that one. :o)

So I have decided to start smaller. Snippets of my life if you will. Not novels. Yes I do put that kind of pressure on myself. To write the every lasting saga. A snippet is doable. And not nearly as scary. So if you read this and you are a seasoned blogger give the new girl a few tips. I want to grow in this and become better at expressing my thoughts on paper.


So a snippet here and a snippet there is worth a try.

Now off to do laundry
and then to work